Mummy Guilt, Single Parent Dilemma or just the fact if Life

 

Perspective of a single parent go getter / entrepreneur:

Today I left home at 2pm to go to Home Depot and Lowe's in search of materials for a real estate rehab project. Left kids at home. Didn't make it back until 8pm. 6 hrs of leaving kids home alone. 

1st I dont think this is even legal.

2nd, it just makes me very uneasy as a parent - some call it mummy guilt but for me the feeling is more palpable. The opportunity cost of this particular business venture and every other one I have embarked on, is quality time with myself, my children, grocery shopping so as to cook a healthy meal or just snuggling up to a good movie after a long week of mind twisting, pulse raising meetings, IT Mgt SME consulting, and Excel spreadsheets analysis. On this particular day, the opportunity cost feels even higher i.e. spending valentine's day with the loves of my life - Justin and Tamilore during their formative years.

I cannot run such errands during the week when they are in school due to my day job, so what time does that leave me to pursue entrepreneurial dreams, goals and passions for passive income?

T and Kay's approach seem more appealing to me right now. Why not invest any extra funds in an index fund that will get me a good enough profitable rate of return without me putting all this mental capacity and time into building a business so as to earn passive income?

When kids are grown and off to college then I can redirect any spare time to entrepreneurial ventures like this.

One of my real estate mentor's Leng, says she finds joy in the act of BRRR. This is not my first rodeo with real estate, however, if I am to be true to self, since my first purchase in 2005 till now - I do not find being a landlord or real estate investor joyful. 

The question I owe to self to answer then is - *what vocation brings me joy?*
Well, lately  I don't know anymore 😤☹😐. All I know is that working like a modern day slave in a job that acknowledges my value-added contributions but does not recognize nor reward me for them makes me feel under valued, under accomplished like I am wasting away precious time. To continue to work so hard to build someone else's business - even if that business is a well paying fortune 500 company does not fulfill me. There lies my dilemma! Yes, I am an entrepreneur at heart but now...entrepreneurship begets inadequacy as a mom while office worker depresses me.

Alas what do I do now?!!!