The molding

My childhood memories are one of a shy timid little girl who always felt 'othered' - as in not feeling like I fully belonged in any group. The only girl of 3 brothers, 2 uncles and one male cousin, I felt othered even at home.  I remember many days pleading with my mom to have a girl child. My mom indulged me for the longest, even went as far as saying her school daughter from when she was in boarding school was my sister - this at this point is a grown married woman. Nice try mummy but I wasn't falling for that one. 

With a sister not forth coming, I clung even tighter to my neighbor friend, Lara. Lara was the little girl about my age who lived next door to us. She was a boisterous, adventurous, had a vivid imagination that translated to many make belief reenactment of movies we watched - especially Indian movies like Sholey. The lonely child in me looked to get from Lara what I expected my very own sister, if I had one, would give me - companionship, an ally, loyalty, company. I got those things but to my dismay they came at a price - my voice, my independent thinking. Little did I know it was only the beginning of a dominant vs. demure relationship that will last a long time.